Out with the old

Disclaimer:  I am dusting off this blog in order to have some record and accountability for myself.  I expect it to be boring to most people and I won't be offended if no one reads it :)

So here I am again.  Overweight, feeling lazy and sluggish, and so unhappy with myself that I have trouble getting up, let alone doing anything about it.  I looked at the calendar today and realized another year is almost gone and I have not only NOT gotten healthier but have actually gained weight and lost more fitness and endurance.

THIS HAS TO STOP!

I am 50 years old.  I have a 6 year old that is depending on me being here for her, not to mention my 4 other grown kids. I have grandchildren that I want to watch grow up.  I have a husband that I want to spend as much time with as possible.  I have a career that I want to see grow.  I have too much to look forward to.  I don't want it to end too soon because I couldn't commit to my own health.

So.  It has started today.  Today, I will make myself and my health a priority.  My plan is to log my daily activity, how my diet was for the day (and by diet I mean how healthy, or not, that it was, not a fad diet), my water intake, and how I felt.  I'm hoping to do this daily but will be gentle with myself if I have to skip a day or two of logging because of life.

Here we go:

Day 1 
Workout:  3.44 miles - 53 minutes
Diet:  Still to be determined.  Protein shake for breakfast.  Will log on MFP
Water:  1 down, 7 to go.  Will also log on MFP
How I feel:  This is the hardest one.  I am so ambivalent right now.  I feel good that I've started, scared that I'll fail.  I want to feel strong but I really feel weak.  I'm proud that I started.  Embarrassed that it's come to this. 

You may have noticed I say nothing about weight or measurements or clothing sizes.  I did that on purpose.  Too often I let the numbers define me and I give up because they don't change as fast as I'd like them to.  This time, I am focusing on the feelings and the commitment to the activity.  If the numbers come, that's great.  What is most important to me is that I get healthy.

If anyone is here...thank you.  Your support means more than I can tell you.  I will try not to let you down.